We might have read to here. If not go back and read. Nowadays, so much to do. So many places to be; responsibilities, needs, wants, desires again I state the list goes endlessly on. What then? notwithstanding, every way, whether in pretence, or in truth, Christ is preached; and I therein do rejoice, yea, and will rejoice.
For I know that this shall turn to my salvation through your prayer, and the supply of the Spirit of Jesus Christ.
The one preach Christ of contention, not sincerely, supposing to add affliction to my bonds: But the other of love, knowing that I am set for the defence of the gospel. According to my earnest expectation and my hope, that in nothing I shall be ashamed, but that with all boldness, as always, so now also Christ shall be magnified in my body, whether it be by life, or by death. For to me to live is Christ, and to die is gain.
But if I live in the flesh, this is the fruit of my labour: yet what I shall choose I wot not. For I am in a strait betwixt two, having a desire to depart, and to be with Christ; which is far better: Nevertheless to abide in the flesh is more needful for you. And having this confidence, I know that I shall abide and continue with you all for your furtherance and joy of faith; Philippians1:18-25
It is amazing that the same words Paul used are words that I can say and mean with all me heart. Yes, there are children, family members etc it would be selfish to want to go. Having seen just a fraction (not knowing I was physically dead) I didn’t grasp the enormity of my decision. Yes, depression set in. How could it not??? The things I saw in this albeitly short dream were awesome. Even when it comes to children I had no worries.
But the words of Paul stick where it matters; I was sent back for a reason and I will accomplish it. Funny enough, the places I get resistance. But come high waters, I will do what I came to do. Then, I can be at peace having spread the great news that it is much better there than here. So, folks make the right decision that God be glorified in you.